An entire week has gone by me now.....
NO SODA....
NO SUGAR....
NO CHIPS.....
NO FRENCH FRIES.....
NO MCDONALDS OR CHIC FIL A (NO FAST FOOD PERIOD)....
NO ICE CREAM....
NO CANDY BARS & THIS INCLUDES ANYTHING WITH CHOCOLATE....
NO JUICY MEDIUM RARE STEAK.....
NO MILK, YOGURT, SOUR CREAM, COTTAGE CHEESE, CHEESE (NO ENTIRE DAIRY SECTION).....
NO FLAVORFUL DRINKS....
NO ROAST...
NO TACOS OR MEXICAN....
NO POTATO SALAD....
NO SUGAR CEREAL....
NO WHITE FLOUR, OR WHEAT FLOUR FOR THAT MATTER...
NO PASTA (YUM)....
Alright do you get my drift? No NOTHING, NADA, ZILCH, ZIPPO!!!!
I have not had any of these food in the past week. I have been strong holding onto following this plan for my body. It isn't so bad as it may seem, here is a small list of things I do get to eat....
MUNG BEANS....
CHICK PEAS....
ADUZKI BEANS....
BROWN RICE...
BROWN RICE CEREAL....
SOY MILK.....
PINEAPPLE JUICE....
TOFU....
CORN CAKES OR RYE CRISP.... (RYE TASTE LIKE CARDBOARD & LOOKS IT)....
SHRIMP.....
ORGANIC CHICKEN....
GREENS....
CELERY & RADISH JUICE (NIGHTLY).....(NASTY, UGH, TOO HOT)
SPICED TEA.....
FISH....
MOST FRUITS....
HOMEMADE HUMMUS....(GROSS, GROSS, GROSS)...DID I MAKE MY POINT?
Now doesn't that all sound so delightful? I mean who eats this stuff? Oh, wait there are a few or a few thousands called vegetarians or vegans minus the fish & chicken. I haven't found that I am craving any of the things I am missing in my diet, sometimes I long for a piece of cheese all nice and gooey and yummy, but as far as other cravings they have COME & GONE!!!
I find myself doing my daily trend of following this meal plan and changing up the menu a little bit. I still can't believe that my body is not craving the one thing I have been addicted to for so many years and that is the love of THE DR....PEPPER or Mr. PIBB that is! Oh, how these quench my thirst and the sugar on my tongue as it's going down....WOWZERS no wonder they are implied men, women will swoon over them. However, I do believe when this meal plan comes to an end that this woman won't be doing too much swooning for the mere fact that so much time has passed on by (I HOPE)!!
Overall I find myself feeling better and both Guy and myself have noticed that my left leg isn't so swollen and puffy or red and it doesn't hurt all the time like it use to!!
I did however get a charlie horse the other night, and then a few days later I got one in my other calf....I wonder if that has something to do with the pills I am taking??
The bad bad monster that lives in our bathroom named THE SCALE says that I have lost 8lbs but I know or so I say most of it is water and that's what I wanted, while Guy says I have lost actual fat too. Hopefully I will keep dropping and the water will just pee out of me.....
This week I am introducing myself back to the gym now that I have one full week of the new eating. I had been reading a lot trying to figure out which was the best way to lose weight either high intensity or low intensity and I have found that everywhere says to do low intensity workout's for at least 30 min within your heart rate for a good work out. So, instead of doing a high which they say are for those that are maintaining themselves and NOT actually looking to lose weight, this shall be what I will incorporate and hopefully more weight will come off.
I am just glad that I have DONE ONE WHOLE WEEK and STUCK WITH IT!!!
Tuesday, May 31, 2011
Thursday, May 26, 2011
Not A Failure!
So as the week has been progressing, I too have been progressing in my desire to figure out how to heal my body. On Tuesday it was so hard for me to feel like I could follow this program as well as have the will power to keep going. For feeling so bleak on Tuesday and such despair Wednesday and Thursday have prevailed allowing me to KNOW that I can do this and I DO HAVE THE WILL POWER!!
Yesterday's dinner was awesome if I do say so myself. It consisted of lightly toasted tofu dipped in brown rice flour, mushrooms, broccoli, garlic and soy sauce. Basically a vegetarian's stir fry. Anthony and Alexander wanted some because it's aroma's filled the whole house, they too found it pretty good except Alexander and mushrooms. Guy also ate some and of course said "it's edible" but he had two bowls, so I assume it was more than just something that was "edible"!!
I tried soy yogurt as well yesterday. It was alright, creamier than regular yogurt but not quite as flavorful. At least it wasn't something that was totally gross. Now, something that I do find gross and not so great is coconut milk. It has NO FLAVOR!!! It isn't the sweetened kind of coconut milk but just pure white silk almost. I will take the soy flavored milk any day in comparison to the coconut.
I am enjoying trying new things everyday. Some things are better left on the shelf and others are not so bad, corn cakes taste just like corn which to me makes them better than rice cakes.
Broccoli, potato and onion soup isn't so bad after the flavors have mixed well a few days later.
Asian spice tea tickles my nose with the great aroma's that come from the seeping tea. For one who does not drink tea and will not keep drinking it after this is done, it's not half bad.
I am not a fan of brown rice cereal such as crispy (which are just like rice krispys) there isn't much of a taste but I will still eat them since it's my breakfast every day for the next four weeks.
I find that I am not craving anything. But when I see and smell food that I know I can not have I get jealous of others who are enjoying such tasty, good looking food. But I keep reminding myself that I am only in the first week and for this to work I have to be strict and strict with my diet I am not. This will be the 1st thing that I will have accomplished when it comes to doing something and following through instead of the usual "I'll start next week" or "it's no big deal."
My friend gave me this cookie fortune today and it suits me to a "T" in my life right now it says:
"YOU'RE NOT A FAILURE BECAUSE YOU DON'T MAKE IT, YOU'RE A SUCCESS BECAUSE YOU TRIED!"
How inspiring this is. I am not expecting major weight loss results, but a curb in this aliment that plagues my leg with swelling and pain. I am wanting this to work so desperately that if it doesn't I will be very upset but as it says I am a success because I tried this to better myself.
Yesterday's dinner was awesome if I do say so myself. It consisted of lightly toasted tofu dipped in brown rice flour, mushrooms, broccoli, garlic and soy sauce. Basically a vegetarian's stir fry. Anthony and Alexander wanted some because it's aroma's filled the whole house, they too found it pretty good except Alexander and mushrooms. Guy also ate some and of course said "it's edible" but he had two bowls, so I assume it was more than just something that was "edible"!!
I tried soy yogurt as well yesterday. It was alright, creamier than regular yogurt but not quite as flavorful. At least it wasn't something that was totally gross. Now, something that I do find gross and not so great is coconut milk. It has NO FLAVOR!!! It isn't the sweetened kind of coconut milk but just pure white silk almost. I will take the soy flavored milk any day in comparison to the coconut.
I am enjoying trying new things everyday. Some things are better left on the shelf and others are not so bad, corn cakes taste just like corn which to me makes them better than rice cakes.
Broccoli, potato and onion soup isn't so bad after the flavors have mixed well a few days later.
Asian spice tea tickles my nose with the great aroma's that come from the seeping tea. For one who does not drink tea and will not keep drinking it after this is done, it's not half bad.
I am not a fan of brown rice cereal such as crispy (which are just like rice krispys) there isn't much of a taste but I will still eat them since it's my breakfast every day for the next four weeks.
I find that I am not craving anything. But when I see and smell food that I know I can not have I get jealous of others who are enjoying such tasty, good looking food. But I keep reminding myself that I am only in the first week and for this to work I have to be strict and strict with my diet I am not. This will be the 1st thing that I will have accomplished when it comes to doing something and following through instead of the usual "I'll start next week" or "it's no big deal."
My friend gave me this cookie fortune today and it suits me to a "T" in my life right now it says:
"YOU'RE NOT A FAILURE BECAUSE YOU DON'T MAKE IT, YOU'RE A SUCCESS BECAUSE YOU TRIED!"
How inspiring this is. I am not expecting major weight loss results, but a curb in this aliment that plagues my leg with swelling and pain. I am wanting this to work so desperately that if it doesn't I will be very upset but as it says I am a success because I tried this to better myself.
Tuesday, May 24, 2011
Day Two
Wow what a very very long day. I am so worn and wiped out today and I am not quite sure why, I feel as if everything is just gone from me and I have nothing to give to anyone. Here it is 6:30 in the evening time and I am ready to crawl into bed and call it a day.
Today has been so hard to get through. All the cravings of things that I could normally just eat and enjoy. The early Mountain Dew that gives me an energy rush to chocolate or something ever so sweet to curve that sweet tooth. Normally I would of just consumed them and thought nothing of it but on this plan I know it will do harm and I will not get the full results that I need from this.
They say that the 1st week of anything new is always the hardest and I am finding that more true as today has been such a struggle BUT I did not cave into those temptations that kept coming towards me today.
I did find out though that I do not like soy milk in cereal. I don't mind it in smoothies but soy is not the greatest.
Breakfast was the same as yesterday, didn't change expect I added the soy milk.
Lunch was somewhat a bust because I didn't have enough time to eat it which consisted of soup, banana, rye crackers.
Dinner was DELICIOUS!!!! I had chicken, brown rice and vegetables with pineapple juice, now that's a normal meal.
I told Guy today that I couldn't do this that I give up. But I know that I need to follow through, not so much about losing the weight but more of figuring out the water retention problem that is plaguing my body.
SO DAY TWO IS DONE WITH AND I STUCK TO IT!!
Today has been so hard to get through. All the cravings of things that I could normally just eat and enjoy. The early Mountain Dew that gives me an energy rush to chocolate or something ever so sweet to curve that sweet tooth. Normally I would of just consumed them and thought nothing of it but on this plan I know it will do harm and I will not get the full results that I need from this.
They say that the 1st week of anything new is always the hardest and I am finding that more true as today has been such a struggle BUT I did not cave into those temptations that kept coming towards me today.
I did find out though that I do not like soy milk in cereal. I don't mind it in smoothies but soy is not the greatest.
Breakfast was the same as yesterday, didn't change expect I added the soy milk.
Lunch was somewhat a bust because I didn't have enough time to eat it which consisted of soup, banana, rye crackers.
Dinner was DELICIOUS!!!! I had chicken, brown rice and vegetables with pineapple juice, now that's a normal meal.
I told Guy today that I couldn't do this that I give up. But I know that I need to follow through, not so much about losing the weight but more of figuring out the water retention problem that is plaguing my body.
SO DAY TWO IS DONE WITH AND I STUCK TO IT!!
Monday, May 23, 2011
Once Again......
I keep writing and deleting the things that my fingers type as my brain thinks them, how annoying is that for me to think that my own thoughts are not good enough for my own page? Really?
I have been suffering with severe water retention ever since the birth of Alexander some 10 years ago. It doesn't ever fully go away and these past few months it seems to have gotten worse, I don't know if it is because my age is going over the hill or if I am doing more things to exert myself or what. But the pain and uncomfortableness I feel in my left leg is starting to wear on me, as I start to doubt that I will ever be healed. My veins are leaking water into my body just right underneath the skin which causes the water retention, my veins are damaged just like their owner I am damaged to some degree, mentally and physically.
So in my efforts to try and fix this without turning to the Dr's for a diuretic which in turn I have to take a potassium pill to counteract the diuretic taking all my nutrients out of my liver and kidneys I have been looking for something that will teach me how to fix the problem without relaying on the doctor's pills.
I found a book called "The Water Retention Diet" which states I could lose UP to 14 lbs. in 7 days OH MY GOODNESS really? Haha I doubt that and that is NOT why I started this diet. I was more intrigued into the water retention part and how it will help me figure out this ugly, self-hatred part of me. So here goes nothing.
After reading the book and understanding that I can not lose any kind of weight until I have the water retention under control, and I understand my body and the things it is doing to me to make me go insane. This takes everything yummy, salty, sweet, sugary, chocolaty, gooey, fattening, OK basically anything that has a flavor to it out of my diet. And after 4 weeks of doing this I can start to add things in slowly.
I am now eating things officially such as tofu, aduzki beans, fava beans, mung beans, soy milk, hummus, brown rice pasta, brown rice flour, celery and beet juice.
Today was the 1st day. I didn't do too bad.
Breakfast: Rice cereal with soy milk
Hot Spice tea
Lunch: Aduzki bean salad
Broccoli, potato soup
Rye Crackers with olive oil spread
And an orange
Dinner: Baked Taliapia
Mixed vegetables such as broccoli, cauliflower and carrots
Baked Potato with nothing on it
And a glass of pineapple juice ( I must say this was my favorite part )
My nightly drink is a celery/radish juice. Spicy and not all that bad just a different taste which my taste buds will come to acquire within the next four weeks.
I didn't do too bad today. I must be honest I did cheat when I saw some coconut cookies laying in the baggie, I had to have me some. So, I ate one, two and maybe three or four. But I didn't cheat on anything else today which means:
NO SODA
NO SALT
NO DONUTS
NO CANDY BARS
NO NOTHING GOOD TO EAT
I don't know if this is going to kill me if I do accomplish it or if it's going to make me a better person. I am not looking at this for losing weight but merely to help my body recover from the weak veins and holding onto water that should go out of my system.
I have four long weeks of this, 27 more days to go at least on the hard part.
This too shall pass, Correct?
I have been suffering with severe water retention ever since the birth of Alexander some 10 years ago. It doesn't ever fully go away and these past few months it seems to have gotten worse, I don't know if it is because my age is going over the hill or if I am doing more things to exert myself or what. But the pain and uncomfortableness I feel in my left leg is starting to wear on me, as I start to doubt that I will ever be healed. My veins are leaking water into my body just right underneath the skin which causes the water retention, my veins are damaged just like their owner I am damaged to some degree, mentally and physically.
So in my efforts to try and fix this without turning to the Dr's for a diuretic which in turn I have to take a potassium pill to counteract the diuretic taking all my nutrients out of my liver and kidneys I have been looking for something that will teach me how to fix the problem without relaying on the doctor's pills.
I found a book called "The Water Retention Diet" which states I could lose UP to 14 lbs. in 7 days OH MY GOODNESS really? Haha I doubt that and that is NOT why I started this diet. I was more intrigued into the water retention part and how it will help me figure out this ugly, self-hatred part of me. So here goes nothing.
After reading the book and understanding that I can not lose any kind of weight until I have the water retention under control, and I understand my body and the things it is doing to me to make me go insane. This takes everything yummy, salty, sweet, sugary, chocolaty, gooey, fattening, OK basically anything that has a flavor to it out of my diet. And after 4 weeks of doing this I can start to add things in slowly.
I am now eating things officially such as tofu, aduzki beans, fava beans, mung beans, soy milk, hummus, brown rice pasta, brown rice flour, celery and beet juice.
Today was the 1st day. I didn't do too bad.
Breakfast: Rice cereal with soy milk
Hot Spice tea
Lunch: Aduzki bean salad
Broccoli, potato soup
Rye Crackers with olive oil spread
And an orange
Dinner: Baked Taliapia
Mixed vegetables such as broccoli, cauliflower and carrots
Baked Potato with nothing on it
And a glass of pineapple juice ( I must say this was my favorite part )
My nightly drink is a celery/radish juice. Spicy and not all that bad just a different taste which my taste buds will come to acquire within the next four weeks.
I didn't do too bad today. I must be honest I did cheat when I saw some coconut cookies laying in the baggie, I had to have me some. So, I ate one, two and maybe three or four. But I didn't cheat on anything else today which means:
NO SODA
NO SALT
NO DONUTS
NO CANDY BARS
NO NOTHING GOOD TO EAT
I don't know if this is going to kill me if I do accomplish it or if it's going to make me a better person. I am not looking at this for losing weight but merely to help my body recover from the weak veins and holding onto water that should go out of my system.
I have four long weeks of this, 27 more days to go at least on the hard part.
This too shall pass, Correct?
Sunday, October 31, 2010
I just don't even know anymore....
I am struggling to figure things out.
The tears come so quickly now, that it's pointless to wipe them away.
I feel a deep sadness as I watch you suffer silently in pain.....
My sweet daughter tried to take her own life these past week. To my complete horror I found her sitting in her own vomit & urine having hallucinations from the drug overdose that she was hoping was going to claim her life.
As a Mother I had no idea that she would do this. I have heard her say to her friends that her life just sucks and she want's to die but I never thought she would take action. We had gotten her into therapy and on anti depressants for a few months when she felt that there was no way she could endure her life anymore and sought a way to end it.
I have never experienced such sadness in my life. Yes, I have had some serious trials myself but to watch my child suffer inside and all by herself made this almost unbearable for me as well. I know her and I have issues, issues that run deep but I also know the issues she is having in an unhealthy relationship has damaged her and complicated things more than I could imagine.
I don't even know where to begin my thoughts...
I don't know where to turn for comfort of my soul and the sadness that is running deep within.....
I feel like I don't know anything anymore as my life is now upside down.....
I feel angry at times then complete sadness at others.....
I sit and just cry, wondering how we are going to heal as a family ......
I know I have to do what I can so she can be healthy & happy once again.....
I feel utter despair when I should be happy knowing that SHE IS ALIVE & I still have her....
I just don't even know anymore.....
The tears come so quickly now, that it's pointless to wipe them away.
I feel a deep sadness as I watch you suffer silently in pain.....
My sweet daughter tried to take her own life these past week. To my complete horror I found her sitting in her own vomit & urine having hallucinations from the drug overdose that she was hoping was going to claim her life.
As a Mother I had no idea that she would do this. I have heard her say to her friends that her life just sucks and she want's to die but I never thought she would take action. We had gotten her into therapy and on anti depressants for a few months when she felt that there was no way she could endure her life anymore and sought a way to end it.
I have never experienced such sadness in my life. Yes, I have had some serious trials myself but to watch my child suffer inside and all by herself made this almost unbearable for me as well. I know her and I have issues, issues that run deep but I also know the issues she is having in an unhealthy relationship has damaged her and complicated things more than I could imagine.
I don't even know where to begin my thoughts...
I don't know where to turn for comfort of my soul and the sadness that is running deep within.....
I feel like I don't know anything anymore as my life is now upside down.....
I feel angry at times then complete sadness at others.....
I sit and just cry, wondering how we are going to heal as a family ......
I know I have to do what I can so she can be healthy & happy once again.....
I feel utter despair when I should be happy knowing that SHE IS ALIVE & I still have her....
I just don't even know anymore.....
He'll Carry You, For My Daughter
For my daughter, Lindsey. The Lord will carry you Sweetheart through all your troubles and heartache. He loves you more than you will ever know. The Lord is a comfort to us when we don't know which way is up or down and no human words can help you heal.
My sweet daughter I am so sorry that you are in such great despair and experiencing such sadness in your life. There is nothing more sad than to watch your child suffer and feeling helpless as she makes her choices. I love you Lindsey and I pray for you to be able to heal through such a rough time and a time of sorrow and sadness.
Thursday, September 2, 2010
Cleanliness Is Next To Godliness...
There is no actual reference in the scriptures that "cleanliness is next to godliness " but we have all spoken these famous words once or twice. I looked online to see where this statement actually came from, it was spoken by a man by the name of John Wesley who used those words in a sermon ( so I assume he was a preacher.)
I find that I rather enjoy cleaning my home. I need to be cleaning my soul instead, but the home is a start right?
When we went down to our beach pad a few weeks ago, our trusty vacuum down there decided to break a belt, well it actually had some help with our friend Dan as he was vacuuming the 1st night down and broke the belt. As these men like to think that they can buy anything at Wal-Mart this is not true with this belt which I tried to tell them ( we have the same vacuum at our home & I had to buy our belts at Sears, So I know ) but oh no they both thought that it would be easy to find a matching belt. When they were unable to do so the redneck men took dutch tape to the belt hoping it would hold, this was not to be, but NICE try boys.
We went to the local hardware store to see if they had any vacuums to buy....we did not see any. The next day Guy and Dan went back to the hardware store and sure enough had found one at the ripe old price of $75.00 dollars I do NOT think I have ever paid that much for such a thing. I also thought that we weren't going to get one so to my surprise I was really surprised and at that PRICE! Guy thought that we would bring the new vacuum home to our house and just bring some belts down the next time we head to the shore ( fine, why not I thought.)
Oh, would you like to see what a $75.00 dollar vacuum looks like? I know you really do, so I will oblige you.
This has made me very happy more than he will ever know, I love to clean and having an awesome vacuum is one of life's smallest and simplest pleasures. I don't know how clean I am, but I know I am getting there.
I find that I rather enjoy cleaning my home. I need to be cleaning my soul instead, but the home is a start right?
When we went down to our beach pad a few weeks ago, our trusty vacuum down there decided to break a belt, well it actually had some help with our friend Dan as he was vacuuming the 1st night down and broke the belt. As these men like to think that they can buy anything at Wal-Mart this is not true with this belt which I tried to tell them ( we have the same vacuum at our home & I had to buy our belts at Sears, So I know ) but oh no they both thought that it would be easy to find a matching belt. When they were unable to do so the redneck men took dutch tape to the belt hoping it would hold, this was not to be, but NICE try boys.
We went to the local hardware store to see if they had any vacuums to buy....we did not see any. The next day Guy and Dan went back to the hardware store and sure enough had found one at the ripe old price of $75.00 dollars I do NOT think I have ever paid that much for such a thing. I also thought that we weren't going to get one so to my surprise I was really surprised and at that PRICE! Guy thought that we would bring the new vacuum home to our house and just bring some belts down the next time we head to the shore ( fine, why not I thought.)
Oh, would you like to see what a $75.00 dollar vacuum looks like? I know you really do, so I will oblige you.
This is the Eureka Light Speed 12amp vacuum.
Worth $75.00
I
THINK
NOT
I did much cleaning with this vacuum for the past 2 weeks, it does work well I must admit, it is light and speedy.
HOWEVER, there is ONE major PROBLEM....
THERE
ARE
NO
REPLACEMENT BAGS
TO BE
FOUND!
- If you go to Wal-Mart thinking they have them, they DON'T.
- If you go to Sears ( because you looked online and they said they have them) well, they DON'T.
- If you think of going to the local Hardware Store for them, they DON'T.
- If you think calling the local Vacuum Store to see if they have them, well, they close at 5.
SO......................
It appears the ONLY place you can purchase these little gems are online. Are you KIDDING ME? I can't believe that. How does that help a person who would like to vacuum their home so it's shows the fakeness that this house is "next to godliness?"
All I wanted yesterday was to vacuum my home, nothing more and nothing less? Was that asking too much of what yesterday brought me? It must of been because this little vacuum brought much distress to my marriage over the bag that it needed so it could do it's job, it has one job ONLY and it couldn't even do that.
I argued with Guy over the matter that this was the most stupidest vacuum ever as well as the most stupidest thing that you can't buy a replacement bag anywhere in town. Oh, how the frustration and aggravation that came bursting out of me towards the man I love & I couldn't let it go for some reason.
ON & ON I WENT!!
Isn't it just silly that we would argue over a vacuum or more or less I would allow myself to stoop that low ( as low as the floor since that is what this machine is used for.)
My Dear Husband
left our home
without a
word
&
when he returned
he carried in
a
New Vacuum
Now, how could I possibly stay angry at a man that went above and beyond anything I had asked him. In fact I had come to terms that we would order the bags online and take the new vacuum back to the beach house as it had been intended anyways. I was also content with the fact that I would continue to use the old vacuum that I had been before we went to the beach.
I started to cry as I apologized for making such a huge stink about a silly little thing, I cupped his face ever so gently and kissed him, telling him " I am sorry " those words are the hardest words to ever form on my lips. Who likes telling others they are sorry for making a situation worse or making others feel bad? But, as I am trying to clean my soul this was the right thing to do.
The new vacuum is awesome and NOT just because it's purple my favorite color, but because it's got some power to it and it was bought with LOVE....
It's fantastic at picking little things up, it works well in the bunny cage, works great on the furniture (has a rolling brush for that,) and THE BEST PART IS THAT IT'S a CANISTER not a BAG!!!!
Such a lovely little gem! It even has a pet hair brush.
So, which one would you prefer?
I have to remember just how much my husband loves me. His words to me last night is that he was so sorry that he caused me so much stress and contention over this. He was unhappy seeing me unhappy and thought what could he do to make mama happy as he so endearing calls me.
This has made me very happy more than he will ever know, I love to clean and having an awesome vacuum is one of life's smallest and simplest pleasures. I don't know how clean I am, but I know I am getting there.
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